Fair warning: There's complaining here.
All that yelling I'd been dreading happened people called for them to kick me, called me the worst tank of the year and several other things I'd much rather block from my memory, so I left before they were forced to finish voting and went to lick my wounds. If they had let me stay I'd have been too shaken (and disgusted with myself) to tank well anyway.
That night when SprYte was over I decided it was time to 'get back on the horse' and give it another go. I do know that fight and with a less distracted and more alert brain I was bound to do it as well as I usually do. Immerseus went down fine and we got to Protectors, but just before we all got gathered and ready to go the other tank left. I settled in to wait for a replacement, but one of the dps wasn't having it and pulled.
So I picked up Rook and He and tried to wing it solo. I'm sure solo tanking them in LFR isn't a big deal for a better geared tank who knows the fight inside and out but I'd never tank Rook before and didn't know what he did except that I couldn't point him at the raid. I was freaking out. Poor SprYte got an earful, but I was managing to hold them both and avoid gouge and the healers had me standing. At least they did up until the point that someone passed the Mark of Anguish to me while I was still tanking Rook, and Sun's desperate measures went off before it went down and my health vanished so fast I barely had time to see it.
The Battle Rez was fairly quick, I got the bosses picked back up, but when Mark came up again they handed it to me and Sun went and wouldn't you know it, I was back to tanking the floor. That time there was no Battle Rez and the party wiped.
Probably unsurprisingly I was the first person to get blamed in chat. The trash talking started and I was debating whether or not I wanted to hang it up for the night when somebody spoke up and said that I'd been doing great but I couldn't handle the mark and Sun adds, though. People actually stopped blaming me and started arguing about other things. We got another tank and the rest of it went fine, and despite that wipe I felt a lot better about myself than I had that morning. Not only because of those words, though they helped, but because I knew I'd done pretty well with what I was given.
Still, it'll take a while to get my confidence entirely back, and I can't help that I'm still a little angry, not because I got called on my mistake but because of the level of hurtful comments made about it. I knew I'd made a mistake, I felt bad about it already, but I'm a human, it'll happen sometimes. What upsets me most though, was that second wipe, they were ready to blame me for that too, until somebody spoke up. But you know who never got blamed or threatened with a kick? The dps who pulled with only one tank in the first place.